5 practical tips for setting boundaries
Setting boundaries, learning and daring to say no; it may seem like an open door. Yet we massively fail to do this. It starts with recognizing and acknowledging it. Because your colleagues and other people cannot tell where your boundaries are from your body language or unspoken expectations, it is important to speak out explicitly about them.
Effect of going beyond boundaries
When one is permanently over your limits, you may experience a loss of energy and stress levels (= read cortisol, the stress hormone) in the body and brain skyrocket. Cortisol actually allows you to stay alert for an extended period of time. Does the amount of stress hormone not decrease? Then you will find yourself exhausted on both a physical and mental level. From fatigue, misunderstanding, stress to even burnout symptoms as a result.
But, what is meant by setting boundaries?
By this we mean that you dare to indicate when someone is asking too much of you, a request where you may indicate that you are not going to succeed.
Why does this bother some more than others?
From time immemorial, humans have been social beings. This is the result of hundreds of thousands of years of evolution. In order to survive, people had the best chance of surviving in a group. This makes many people think (read: more often unconsciously) that if we say no once in a while, we will be liked less. Of course, this is also due to factors such as personality.
5 practical tips for setting boundaries
- Start by acknowledging, identifying and then defining what your limits are; Everyone expresses stress signals differently, some examples of stress manifestations are overtiredness, gastrointestinal complaints, forgetfulness or tenseness. It often helps to explore when you experience one or more of these symptoms and what triggered your in this.
- Recognize the moment when that one colleague, friend or partner crosses your boundaries;
- Protect the boundary by communicating it to another person. Setting boundaries works well from the I message. Keep it close to yourself! So not, "You're always crossing my boundaries and that's not nice." But, "I have a boundary and it is being crossed at the moment, I would like to...
- Start small, that way you will get closer to your goal step by step.
- Practice makes perfect!
Setting boundaries at work
It's also an art to setting boundaries at work. When do you choose for yourself? Find out what suits you and where your development opportunities lie withPuls. For more information about job coaching , please visit our website or contact us without obligation.
